Johnny Marr at the LCR

There once was a guitarist named Marr who played in the Nick Raynes LCR…

You thought this was going to be a bloody limerick didn’t you? Unfortunately, I don’t do limericks, but if you’re after one, don’t sweat it – check out Sliders rhythms on authoritarian band leader ‘Anton Newcombe’ from the prolific psychedelic rock group ‘The BrianJones Town Massacre’ (Its quite charming). Swiftly moving on, yeah… Johnny fucking Marr in the Nick Raynes LCR (I’ll stop now). A certified guitar legend just metres away… I must say, Marr’s physical appearance did take me by surprise. I had the inclination that he was on the shorter side, but his height actually took the piss a little bit? Nah just kidding. The guy’s a certified legend.

Marr took on Norwich on his first night of the UK ‘Call the Comet’ tour, brilliantly supported by Crewel Intentions, a new band fronted by Chilli Jesson formerly of Palma Violets. You could see Chilli harnessing his inner Nick Cave – a true favourite of his. Fronting the crowd in an intensive, artistic display, you could really see why Marr later described them as “The most important new British band”. Despite this, the unsurprisingly old Norfolk crowd wasn’t having any of it. They’d come for one thing, and one thing only: The Smi… **Johnny Marr.

Ill get to the gig at some point, but first… lets talk tickets. They were £30. And yeah, that’s expensive, but Val and I actually thought this was fairly reasonable for a man of Marr’s ilk. Consider that just last year we’d paid a similar amount to see Peter ‘Hooky’ Hook, (former bassist of respected British post-punk groups Joy Division and New Order) who’s now touring the UK’s finest third class venues, doing his best to emulate seminal songs, while wrapping it all up with a healthy bit of “I’m the dog’s bollocks” and a very real, eye opening dash of “let me rip my shirt off because that’s what the crowd will like”??? Jesus. I’m getting way off topic… I think we even considered going to the ‘Clone Roses’ for a knees up but opted for three weeks’ worth of groceries instead. I mean, I guess the point I’m making is that I’d happily pay this much money with the knowledge that Johnny Marr is out there, making interesting new guitar music, with his gorgeous signature Fender Jaguar. Saying this… I would have probably left the venue a little teary eyed if he didn’t crack out ‘Bigmouth Strikes Again’. Luckily he put my mind to rest on only the second song, and the crowd finally woke up.

So back to the main intention of this article: The review. Then again, I’m not even really here to review anything, just mainly to give my vivid account of events. From the very outset the evening just kept getting better, in my mind anyway. The crowd seemed to be getting whipped up in Marr’s charm, his oddly satisfying dancing, and of course his guitar playing, which must have left me looking like a rabid dog at points. Marr and the band played an impressive nineteen songs, periodically dropping Smiths tunes to keep the crowd in order, but by no means overdoing it; his new music was able to hold its own. For me, Hi Hello, Rise, and Easy Money were the favourites of the night. If there’s one thing for sure; Marr hasn’t lost his uncanny knack for writing a pop song! The Norfolk crowd also had the pleasure of witnessing ‘Getting Away with It’, Marr’s first single with the band ‘Electronic’ made up of Bernard Summer of New Order and Neil Tennant of Pet Shop Boys. It definitely got some older hips a shakin’. Towards the back end of the set Marr blurted out something a bit peculiar that I’m still struggling to comprehend (probably the reason this ‘review’ was published a whole tour length late):

“Do you ever wake up in the morning and think why did I get so fucked in Nandos?”

Anyone else want to weigh in on this? Either Johnny Marr quickly googled before the tour what young people like doing these days and thought he’d combine two at random: – (getting fucked) & (Nandos) or clearly I’m hanging around in the wrong circles. My next question, and perhaps most puzzling: How would one even go about getting fucked in Nandos??? From my recollection the South African Savannah dry cider only clocks in at around 4% ABV, and factoring in the double chicken burger, peri salted chips, garlic bread, spicy rice, yada yada yada… things just don’t quite add up. Then again, I could be grossly underestimating actions undertaken in the loos. Who knows? I’d put money on Pete Doherty having done smack in some Costa Coffee baby change toilets at some point in his life, so why not Marr in Nandos? Although isn’t the guy a teetotal vegan anyway?

The night is almost over but it’s not, because everyone in the crowd knows the bloody score, ladies and gentlemen… we’ve got ourselves an encore. It was at this point of the night which truly cemented my love for Marr… he knows the rules, he’s played enough live gigs to know we know, why not say say something funny about it all? Huh, Johnny?

“See you soon, if you get what I mean”

Slider and the Goose.

P.S

So we get our encore, and you get a couple more lines of profound text. I guess if I were to add anymore to this review, it’d have to be good right? The encore is usually the killer tune. I’d have to deliver the “There is a Light That Never Goes Out” of literary encores, the “Don’t Look Back in Anger” of godly post script text… the “Ah Fuck It, I Need Some Sleep” **posts on Facebook and strategically places laptop next to amp for multiples forms of feedback as I waltz out of the lounge, and straight into bed. Goodnight.